Scattered Mind

 

Today has been quite a whirlwind for me. My mind has been racing nonstop, with questions and thoughts flooding in relentlessly. Even when I tried to push them away, they just kept coming back. The disappearance of Bruno has really been weighing on me, causing worry and anxiety that I can't seem to shake off.

As for whether it's better to know or not know what happened, I honestly can't answer that question right now. I'm going through a very challenging time at the moment, and it's difficult to find clarity.

On top of everything, I've been incredibly busy with work and planning, which does bring me some joy and excitement. However, that dark cloud is still hanging over me. To take a break from it all, I decided to step away from my computer and do some housework. I even cooked a vegan dinner for my friend who joined us. It was a nice moment of respite before returning to my work and attempting to finish today's article.

Today is the April full moon, also known as the pink moon. Sometimes, the full moon has a way of triggering or intensifying emotions that lie deep within our subconscious. It's a peculiar phenomenon, but it's something I can't ignore.

Lately, I've been feeling like I need a couple of days off from everything. Just hop in my car and embark on a long road trip, perhaps to Mosses Mountain in Sinai. I would turn off my phone and allow myself to clear my mind from all these worries. I understand that there are certain things we can't control, except for our own actions. Anything beyond that is simply out of our hands.

Since my head feels incredibly cluttered right now, I think it's important for me to take a moment to focus on my breathing and set the intention to let go of this worry. I know deep down that it's not helping me, but as humans, we can't always be perfect or know how to calm our minds. So, for now, I'm accepting how I feel and allowing it to pass in its own time.

I'm going to take some time now to do some deep breathing exercises and then head to bed. Goodnight, everyone.